Its like we are women, and boise state is a gangster rap song. This game is degrading
If your still trying to figure out the moment I stopped caring; it was the point in which you said "I really wasn't sure whose baby it was"
My mom is pretending to be Paula Deen while making breakfast...I'm pretty sure she's sober.
and thats when we got a drunken mammogram in the middle of cvs pharmacy
but i'm paying and its not a date cause he's got a gf and i'm hooking up with his roommate tomorrow night
theres a wall by my room thats like, a prime fucking wall. before i move out SOMEBODY is gonna fuck me on that wall, goddamnit.
I just offered a cat a "drinky drinky" I'd say my night has started
Hahaha she was way into you and you kept arguing about burritos. It was amazing.
I put a zucchini in my pussy for you
I lost my bra at his grandma's house so there's that.
Well he has a golden retriever set as his background so there's no way he was filming us having sex
There's no sexy way to moan the name Ernest. Or Ernie. This relationship is fucked
honestly the most stressful part of moving is the chance my mom will find my vibrator
yeah, last night we handcuffed you and you started crying saying that you weren't a bad person
Do you just want me to shit in a Jack-o-latern
Randomize
