Ask Niel how long his lasts if he plays with it a lot.
he says 15-20 minutes depending on the porn.
no his phone, idiot.
that's the type of pussy you go to the bathroom and wack off before you fuck her, just to last longer inside of her!
when did we get so old that our friends started having LEGITIMATE children?
Just seeing my phone say "picture message from: Senor Floppy Cock", i knew it was going to make me smile.
I hit a bug from across the room with my flip flop boomerang style. That awesome.
I would totes be making out with random people in the name of america if I was at the white house right now
Somehow me not being able to breathe due to cocaine doesn't seem very domesticated.
I knew it would be an interesting night when he showed up at my house on a scooter wearing a six foot american flag as a cape.
I can't believe you big bird do not remember battling a shark last night it turned into a Pokemon battle and big bird over powered the shark
How do I go about this? "Hey, its my birthday in 40 minutes. Would you like to come over for some sex? Also, please bring snacks"?
We just got busted fucking in the hammock by his roommate...I'm so out of here as soon as hes asleep....
I kind of just assumed by how he whisked eggs that he would be bad in bed.
I've never been so turned off by an omelet.
I don’t know what he is but he sure can suck a lollipop.
I am mildly hung over. Decided pants are very unnecessary right now.
Still had our rainbow strip poker new years tradition. End of night we were only wearing mask.
Did you get the usual surprise pics from the strange straight you like to sprinkle in.
Randomize
