i'm forgoing the post-coitus cuddling sesh to ask u this :when he says he loves me and all i can think to say is either "cool" or "i love boning you," what do i do?
you really are a gigantic fucking slut.
sidenote: just remembered sarcasm does not translate through text
it's probably a bad thing that i wasn't even offended, huh?
If I saw her on the street and didn't know about the two of them, I would think the only way she'd ever find love was if she somehow found her way to middle earth and an orc took her in
When we ran out of red solo cups we switched to Starbucks cups for beer pong... Who doesn't want to live in Seattle?
just fit an iguana in a condom...have pics
I bought a fake diamond ring to wear, not only to bars to keep the creeps away, but so that I'll be judged less by the front desk girl at Planned Parenthood
She slept with 4 other guys since we went on a break. And her ex. But apparently she hasn't given any bjs out of respect for me. Why does that comfort me?!
come onnn, where's your sense of adventure?!
I left it in that guy's dorm room.
You hid from a cop under some guy's canoe on his lawn.. It didnt work
I bet his dick wears a tuxedo.
Am I allowed to be in denial about being gay again? Or is that one of those things you can't do?
Halfway through she said I was exactly like she imagined. So many things have been stroked this night.
I am never taking a razor down there again. He'll have to love me as I am.
The tequila monkeys have a drum solo in my skull right now. I can't imagine Emily feels better.
Ya can’t just go throwing accusations around about someone pooping their pants without some hard evidence
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