Gfs sis is in town. Its awkwardly obv that we want to fuck each other.
I wish my grandma would stop using the phrase "he pulled out" when she's talking about her contractor quitting his job.
He told me that he wanted to break up with his girl friend but only after we had sex, only for him to make sure I'm worth it..
My last google search was 'bulk asian wives' I don't know either
Gravity stopped and i'm discussing Greek philosophy with two guys I don't know. There's someone asleep on me. We need to use their dealer.
You said you didn't want to drink anymore so you started shooting vodka down the back of your throat using a syringe. Oh, and then you aimed it at my eye ball...vodka in the eye hurts btw.
I was so intoxicated last night I was giving out my real name and number ugh.
Besides. I seriously had a dream that George W Bush came over and slapped some tabs down on my kitchen counter and said "let's get juiced.". It was a sign to not get too fucked up
Yes stubble LOOKS hot but factor in his shitty bj skills and I might as well have jacked off with apricot scrub
Yeah! Don't let me leave the house without marijuana and a juicer.
I cried at the bar for 30 minutes because I got my arm stuck in my sweater. I got free drinks for the rest of the night after the bartender helped me.
It would be weird sobbing cry sex.
I love friends. Friendship is wonderful. I wish the rain was my friend
Remember the guy with the pretty voice that gave us crabs?
I always want to see you. Honestly my only hesitation is that my ass is still kind of sore from Sunday 🥺
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