How can i ever say i miss u when u wont go away
As my groomsman, I expect you to learn the Thriller dance with me before next September.
she had condoms in her med. cabinet - magnums -I don't think I'm tall enough for this ride
so my class lasted 15 minutes this morning because this kid puked all over himself..only at radford
so far i wrote 500 words for a paper on sean paul performing we be burnin..i can officially do anything on adderral
She touched you, you're now contaminated for 48 hours. Please watch out for rashes, hives and STDs as she's known to have all three.
Currently bar hopping with 30 Navy SEALS. I know i'm safe but damn its hard to pick up chicks when you feel like a big pussy.
they ran out of ice so they are using frozen shrimp in their drinks
is there a legit reason for the weird voicemail I got at 2:14am?all I could make out was 'help me' 'two hours' and 'toilet butt'. wtf did u drink.
#1 lesson to be learned from mardi gras this year: lock your car doors or some grimy dude like me might just bang in it and use your backseat as a kleenex
Thank you for making it possible for me to get laid while having peace of mind my dog is well taken care of.
Hey so when you left last night was i wearing shoes?
just got caught singing "pop that pussy" by a very old man at work. *face palm*
If you set your screensaver to be a slides show, make sure you remove dick pics first. This lesson 1 of living with your great aunt
I am drunk shake weighting right now.
Randomize
