This is evicking siegelnvs
Im sorry?
This is fucking ridiculous*
if i get the "i'm engaged" text one more time, i'm going to shoot myself in the face so my cats won't eat it when i die alone.
shes in my pool wearing only floaties on her arms ill have to raincheck watching march madness with you guys sorry
Im still in bed and cant move and i only had Two beers and a shot last night... how did I make it in college?
God gave us a 4 year grace period.
I just want a box on franzia all to myself. Just me, my wine, my tears, & my self loathing.
This girl would not stay down. It was like night of the living dead. She kept on rising up to haunt anything with a penis
Needless to say they were not happy to find out that we braided their hair together, when one of them woke up needing to puke bad
I learn from experience and I experienced what it would be like to completely lose my mind and then wake up with a stab wound.
I did my patriotic duty. I woke up next to a veteran this morning.
So far I consider it a great summer because I have had to buy Plan B a total of zero times
Apparently I took a selfie with fried chicken at 2 am....I'm still trying to figure out where I got the chicken. I thought I was making mac & cheese.
Have you ever gotten so angry that you stripped in public?
Which emoticons convey sympathy for sleeping with someones bf ??
I'm not complaining, but why is it that every time I hang out with you I come home with random injuries and random girls?
She squirted. We were both surprised. I'm that good.
Randomize
