Lavender boy was great at seduction and crappy in bed.
There's a sucker born every minute but swallowers are harder to find.
So glad I found your sister.
ASIANS HAVE SEX TOO!! I just watched it happen in the library.
When I woke up in the parking lot today I decided it is not a good idea to hang out with you anymore.
It's like you're a magic genie of bad timing
Its not the fact that i woke up wearing a tutu that bugs me its the fact that i have 75 photos of me wearing a tutu on facebook
She's a freaking stalker dude, it's like having some kind of cartoon animal just following around everywhere
we just ate hash browns in a nativity scene with baby jesus
He was telling me how he was trying to grow up. And then 2 minutes later, he told me he was tripping on lsd for the first time.
Sexy intern needs to have caveman sex with me
Idk what y'all are doing but I just want you to know I'm home and if I hear him say "slap it" one more time I'm moving out
U wanna come over and watch talidaga nights. Ill make pancakes
What? It's 130 in the morning.
Aww come on i make bomb ass pancakes
Didn't know my clit could produce that many orgasms in one night. Fuck my husband; think I might have to become a lesbian.
He made me cum 3 times, then immediately after sex packed a bowl and passed it to me. Yeah.. I'll keep him.
Btw I puked in your glovebox
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