dude smells like cheese burgers and loose women...... i want his life
I just found a Chris Hansen soundboard online, care to guess what I'll be doing all day?
I fucking love fucking science majors-- she told me that she wanted to know if her gag reflex got better or worse with alcohol, and that her initial evidence had been inconclusive. So, next few weeks, yeah, gettin blown periodically. All I have to do is keep a log.
Dude, can't find my socks anywhere....
Yeah, you took a shit in the harbor off a wall, used them to wipe. I'm sure they're still on the beach somewhere if you really want them back
just had to re-breakup with her. it was like shooting a dead horse that was crying and talking.
We name dropped you at the liquor store and got a ten percent discount!
update: ifinallt managed t5o be in a. Horizontal position without throwing up... the snmall victories.
I'm not drinking anymore...and by that, I mean until St. Patrick's Day.
Come over. I've made 2 dinners and so many cocktails. I'm a 50's housewife with no family.
Yesterday you said I was the best.
No. I said you DID your best. There's a huge difference.
he came to me for relationship advice and we ended up fucking in my backseat
we just drove past a kid stuck in a tree what a wonderful time to be alive
I dont even remember what i was saying but just one minute i was crying and the next i was showing u my genitals
The party pretty much ended once she shit on the couch
Just made my first drink, took 2 sips feel like god
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