So #1 way to come back last night and #2 wishbone and I broke into his house and i opened joey's door and u were both passed out and pantless.
I'm at this poker game and this kid to my left is bragging about all the chicks he hits including a "playboy model" when all of a sudden this 22 guy looks him in the eye and says "ever fuck a 70 woman. The things they can and are willing to do" Next think the whole table is quiet for an hour. That guys my hero...
Guys are so much hotter at OU. Come my mating season, I am flying south like the geese in the wintertime.
I'm convinced that Kathy Griffin and Andy Dick are the same person...
Wow, So this kid just walked into class, yak'd on his lab partner then runs out. Class is now cancelled. I gotta find this kid and Thank him.
She said my main job as maid of honor is to ensure the groom doesn't find out that each of his seven groomsmen has had his penis inside her.
I just found a thank you note I apparently wrote to my bed last night for letting me borrow the comforter.
I was topless in his bathroom sink taking bong rips , goodmorning . He told me he could get use to this
bad sex. bad bad bad. it was like trying to pick up an overcooked noodle with an empty pringles can. why do these guys always seem to find me?
It's been a year of occasional hook ups....this was bound to happen sometime even with your jank ovary schedule.
I just rolled an Obama blunt and a Romney shame joint for tonight. Vote wisely.
You were great dude. You wanted to charge the guy with fedora $100 to get in.
Yeah, we agreed, but I feel like I need at least one more ride on the bonecoaster
DO NOT TOUCH THE SOAP ITS HAD SOME UNORTHODOX USES WITHIN THE PAST 15 HOURS
So? Find me, fuck me, then you can go to sleep and I'll leave.
Wow. That's the most amazing thing anyone has ever said to me.
Randomize
