hey bro how do you do that fake vagina thing with the tp roll? im bored.
Fun fact: Antibacterial soap will not take the combined smell of bbq sauce and vagina off your hands.
Goldfish can't live in a bowl filled with tequila, lesson learned.
She gives pretty bad head, but when it's in her dad's Lexus SUV it's tough to complain.
When you accidentally type "I want Prince William to fuck me in the ass" to your mom there's really no way to take that back.
rolling absolute tits, turn on the red lights for when i get home.
it's graduation. he's gonna get congratulations slash emotional i cant believe youre leaving me sex.
If kinky sex was an Olympic sport they would be playing the anthem for me as we speak.
It's a lost cause. Soon she's gonna get naked, just let nature run its course
I'm eating those little wheels of cheese and watching storage wars, this is the opposite of sex.
They have beer where we have blood.
Did I seriously answer the door for a home delivery of weed from you and your boss while wearing last night's 80s rockstar face paint?
I kind of really want to call off the engagement but I kind of need his mom's mashed potatoes on thanksgiving so I'm between a rock & a hard place here
Apparently someone was hiding in a storm drain dressed as Pennywise from it and offering passersby free penis enlargement pills.
Woke up with a throbbing vagina and a lesbian in my bed. Then for the hell of it we had morning sex. Definitley bisexual now
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