Getting drunk in a different country is not a good idea. Lets just say spanish women, 17 yr olds from missouri, prostitutes, and a poodle. I don´t want to leave spain.
It smells like weed.
We are in Boulder, Everything smells like weed.
Game over. He has a paternity test request on his table.
you said you were a responsible adult. then you licked the wall.
he got a charlie horse midthrust which triggered my orgasm we're still sorting this out.
We were in the shower and he sat down an wouldn't do anything. I'm so glad he manscapes. It made washing his balls less awkward.
No our divorce decree will not have a blow job clause. Unless my alimony is greatly increased your bj's have been reduced to fantasy status.....
I'm going to need your assistance. I cannot walk back to the house in a bear costume.
I think it's safe to say taking shots on the way to the emergency room was rock bottom. We're going to need to think of ways to top that between now and next new years eve...
I need to stop drinking alone, I wrote a love letter to my tattoos
We had sex to beyonce's "drunk in love" and then he order me pizza. It was perf
Yo this huge scar on my head from the car accident is truly a vag magnet. Probably because I'm telling people I was attacked by a mountain lion and killed it with my bare hands. But hey when life gives you lemons, you use them to get pussy
When's the last time you had sex near some ducks?
I broke another vibrator the other day. Abstinence is not for me.
It's official! Naked girl is back and making stir fry. Still not sure she realizes we can see her whole apartment from our balcony. Cheap beer and a show.
Randomize
