i'll never see her again. i cant remember her last name. this is like cinderella except prince charming drank too much jameson and couldnt save a phone number properly
and on the fourth day, god made foam parties.
i woke up wearing her shoes. this night isn't going on my highlight reel
In an m&m suit playing manhunt drunk. And you thought you werent guna have a good time
She is wasted and this random lady got her to suckle milk from her tit
Why would you hook up with someone whos known for peeibg in someones mouth
Tommarow we shall sacrifice the freshmen to the sun god
Its not even real halloween yet. This extremely toxic yet briliant costume is going to kill me
I wish on days I started my period Chipotle would come to my house with a burrito bar ... Then give me a chocolate cake and a large beer.
He was hammered and shot his pistol into the lawn. Next thing I know sheriffs are at our house with M4s. He likes to party
At least you didn't have a hemorroid rupture while banging
That makes sense.. A good Bj is a trump card in any argument
Serious question, on a scale of go for it to what the fuck are you thinking, what's me going to a monk or any religious official and saying "baptize me daddy" in a serious voice?
Do the security cameras outside your house capture sound? If so your whole family is going to hear me describe my threesome
TSA doesn’t allow handcuffs in carryon bags. Super fun they confiscated them in front of my boss and coworker.
Randomize
