I want to snug with you.
You want my snuggie?
You know, as long as there were ice cream breaks, I would totally eat chips for a living.
I can't believe you made out with me with a french fry in your mouth.
never trust anyone who drives a pt cruiser.... write that down
a lot of self evaluation comes after you have to clean up a trashcan of your own vomit and condoms
My sink just fell out of the wall. I can't deal with this right now
If I have to go to the hospital can we stop by the liquor store on the way?
He thought the strainer was a giant bowl to puke in.
I would never do this in real life. It's only college.
This costume is too restrictive. The priest and I cannot get it on while I am wearing it.
This taxi driver is not happy I am in drag
Our host-mom was rubbing her back sympathetically going "muy bien, chica" while she puked on the beach. So yeah, I think we got the best one.
He makes balloon animals that get you high? Hell yeah invite him over!
...I watched him run on the beach yesterday and I think I started ovulating
I just thought I should tell you that I always know what you are doing. Everywhere. Every time. -Your loving Mother
Randomize
