Crown is evil. It plays hide and seek with my morals
Ran into him today. He apologized via facebook. sometimes I hate our generation
she always made me post sex PB&Js it was like fucking a trashier Martha Stewart
You text me last night that you invented a new food. Cheese-less grilled cheese. Congrats, you made toast.
he said he "kind of had sex before.. Barely" i think it was one of those situations where you slide into home and get tagged out.
this is the 21st century. you drunk fuck him and then go on a date.
I know the scar will be in an obvious place, that's why I'm certain it'll score me cancer blowjobs
Ifound a recepit for a hotel room in my sock. soo.. Ithink thats where my dog is.
Dude she has starbursts in her sports bra. I feel like this is counter productive.
The last thing I remember was paying off her younger brother not to judge me, then puking on his shoes.
I hope after we constantly bang for 2 days straight we can agree to be friends again
Strip mythology. Everyone wins. Most of all me.
Shame?!? Shame only comes from getting naked in front of strangers and it not being awesome
This feels more like a conference of all the people I've fucked in the past year.
Why the fuck is there a goat in the kitchen
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