why am i having a flashback about somewhere we were this weekend with music videos playing? Spike jonze brothers place?? Help me out
I tried to tell him it was only 2:00, but he said since it was 5:00 in New York, it was perfectly acceptable. He then put on a Blues Brothers hat and a pair of wayfarers and left. I expect him home in a few hours with a police escort.
You told him your wedding ring was part of your costume. not okay!!
sorry for covering your dog in whipped cream. his bark made it sound like he wanted it.
He says he's "masters drunk." And if that's anything like "kentucky derby drunk" I know enough to not go over there.
I'm going to get so drunk tonight, I actually feel bad about the 30 seconds of drunken awkward sex I'm going to have with one lucky fat chick.
He was just laying on the stairs and then screamed, "Is that a clubhouse?" I haven't seen him since
After he called me a "spirited little girl" I realized that I need to stop sleeping with guys more than ten years older than me.
I LEAVE YOU TWO ALONE FOR 45 MINUTES AND ALL MY WHIPPED CREAM AND CONDOMS ARE GONE
My internship group is made up of all freshman. Their enthusiasm for education and social interaction sickens me.
so serious though like its almost like I'm playing a game that's my life and Im always losing
I am going to be so excited tomorrow when I find this box of crayons in my purse
If you ever "miss" working, I'm going to fist you with my hulk hands. BOTH of them.
Drunk me just want to text sober me for saving that half rack of ribs I loves you
Most people would agree that it IS in fact slutty to give someone head for free ice cream.
Randomize
