Don't forget I'm 20 now
I liked you more when you were 19
Note to Self: No matter how horny, turned on or in the moment you are, never go down on your gf after she had soccer practice.
I just put lube in Matt's bellybutton. He looks unhappy.
My mom is giving me a "don't tape yourself during sex" talk. It's going to be a long car ride.
Do they fuck in the end of "Lady and the Tramp" or am i just wasting my time
Canada just beat USA, the sad part they still need us to make money so who really won
He said he wanted to have kids with me so they could grow up to be professional linebackers. Not. A. Complient.
I walked into his room and he was naked with a half eaten pecan pie and a bottle of wine.
She insisted on fucking on the futon mattress on the floor, answered the phone call from her boyfriend who was on his way to pick her up, and then had the audacity to ask if I was clean
btw im using a cooler as a purse cause i love string cheese
Well if were past the bullshitting stage yes if not then no I'm not that kind of guy
I need to stop smoking. I just talked to corn.
oh. oh my god. i just had lunch with my mom with semen still on my face.
Naked. Naked is my favorite color.
what a classic moment of my life. A buffet of taco bell and a taser gun.
Randomize
