Went to bed at 4 in a strangers bed. woke up wearing scrubs, realized i was gonna be late for work so i just wore the same clothes as the day before... i don't have a toothbrush and im pretty sure there is leftover semen in my mouth. at some point i think i was at the beach cuz theres is sand in my underwear. i love newport already.
Got laid at the last second. Facebook chat is good for something afterall.
i'm at the gym and so are four guys who have seen my tits. i need winter break.
I'm going to listen to christmas music to trick my body into cooling off.
I wish they had an "I'm Stoned" genre on online Netflix
Oh and I found some acid for the drive back to school, productive day
what kind of roommate is she really? she wouldn't even hold my hair back.
Pretty sure the girl next to me in Chipotle just came out to her mom.
It's not meant to be. I also just shot a turkey baster of gin into Nate's eye, so....
Looks like breakfast in bed is out the window. She can't get up because I "fucked her into paralysis." My stomach is not happy with my dick right now
Yeah then she waddled like a duck in silence sat down and ate the entire paper towel roll.
because of daylight savings time I lost an hour of sex with an incredibly hot guy last night. thanks a lot farmers.
If you can't have hot, loud sex in a dorm for the last time ever, what can you do in this world?
saw a family tailgating a graduation with hard liquor... i'm assuming yours?
are you shitting me? they told me they'd at least wait until 10am
I'm bleeding and intoxicated as I'm walking to my final right now. Wish me luck
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