That chick was all over your bacon last night, grinding on you, I thought you were going to bang her in the club
Dude it was a lap dance
Yeah, I tried playing the "see how long he can stay inside of me" game.. And I lost.
she definitely has that "I'll bang you, but then I'll tell your girlfriend" look to her.
New drinking game: take a shot everytime Jay-Z is played during the NFL draft.
It's 8 am and he's already trying to get me to make out with a girl.
i was wearing footie pjs. how could there be confusion as to who i hooked up with, thats not something you forget
Sounds like sex on a twister board.
An idea that is both hilarious and intriguing...
I'm going on a new diet. It's called the "eat healthy otherwise boys won't want to have sex with your fat ass" diet. Wish me luck.
So I'm guessing that puking on a camper is a straight path to instant termination?
Amazon.com "suggested" I buy both nipple clamps and opera gloves.
There's a potato with a bite taken out of it in the kitchen
we just got sex advice from a midget. You better fucking get here.
You kept singing "your gonna lose that girl" to him right in front of her.. of course you got punched in the face.
ARE YOU DEAD? TEXT Y FOR YES OR N FOR NO.
Third time this week I've caught co workers dry humping. Quarantine really changes people's priorities.
Randomize
