Unfortunately, they didn't pull of their wake and bake plans. Instead, they waked and vomited like a half-retarded giraffe till everyone woke up.
in spanish class. the girl next to me asked what Galapagos were. i told her they were islands. now she thinks Galapagos means islands in spanish
He looked way older than 15. He probably thought that since I have braces I was 15. Fuck. The 6 year age gap is never to be spoken about. Especially because what happened constitutes as illegal.
At the airport and im So hungover. Think anyone will help if I put a note on me reading "flying to Boston, please wake me as we board" and then passing back out?
I can'nr wwn explain this nihght . So amnt dixks. Shitttttt.
at one point he was caressing me in the kitchen asking me my name over and over again and then asking what my favorite continent was
Why do you think it's a no-pants party?
Invite says "dress to impress". Her fault for leaving it open to interpretation.
Had to belly crawl across the floor to the toilet with my eyes closed to puke my life out without making my hangover worse. Three times.
Why did my little sister call me from your phone this morning?
Things like this can't be explained over text man
We now only communicate via Xbox messages. Living together is so easy
Really? I thought your parents stopped loving you when you drunkenly fell through the ceiling...
Are you really surprised she can't remember? That's like 50 people. I couldn't rattle off all 50 state capitols off the top of my head, you're bound to forget a few here and there
You never know true fear until you're on your period in a house full of white furniture.
just wanted to eat pizza off his dick so he let me and he can never forget it
There are regrets.. and there are RAGRETS
Randomize