Michelle Duggar likes to fuuuuck
all i know is that they all tuched my pee cup last night.
Just taught my suite how to queef. I feel like i'm back in 9th grade!
im pretty sure one of the guys i was dancing with at graffiti wrote on my back "you rock". now feel like a danced with a 5 year old.
i have a dinosaur tramp stamp
The story about him having a girlfriend changed real fast when he found out that I was a gymnast
Hes flirting with her via the sauce packets at taco bell....... I have no words
You then proceeded to tell me how good of a cook you were and put raw cookie dough in the champagne.
We smoked a bowl in front of the abortion clinic shouting Obama at the protestors.
That feeling when you're ready to convert to the religion of whatever god will stop the vomit. Dynamite is illegal.
I know you saw me get knocked out after I stepped on that rake why did you leave me there
i'm pretty sure you can't sue someone for "Taking a shit on my kitchen floor."
The dicks good but it's not two trains and a bus good.
So unofficially, he told me he deleted tinder because of me. I think that's a pretty romantic gesture in 2018.
Also: I hate her so much. She's out at hooters, making spelling errors, while I'm literally sitting at a clinic getting std tested. Which of us won the morality award in this break up.
Randomize
