Just did shots with my boss to warm up for our sales call to Childrens Hospital. I love startups.
Apparently, I woke up in the middle of the night, got up out of bed, dropped trou in the corner, squatted, and pissed on the carpet. When Eric heard, he thought it was the dog and started yelling, and I responded by saying "No no, its okay. It's me."
Is it weird that out of everything, Im most worried about chipping a tooth on his prince albert?
Also, did that cop draw hearts on everyone's hands last night?
I can now tell my grandchildren Central Park has really great spots for quickies...
If I had to give her an idea on what it means to be ur date I would compare it to being Ralph macchio's gf in the first karate kid... That's one of the coolest things I've ever said... I love drugs.
at the hospital. the stripper fell on his face when she was trying to grab the dollar bill out of his mouth with her ass. broken nose for sure.
No clues in my phone. Only dialed call: my own social security number. And that was before 10:00pm.
All I'm asking for is flower occasionally, and in return you get to come home to me naked in heels. Is that to much to ask for?
you walked onto the street in the middle of the 10K in your thong. it was a whole new kind of expirience.
I would sacrifice a finger for two more hours of sleep.
Is there a coat check? I stole 10 vases of flowers along with two bottles of champagne and I'm not sure what to do with them.
Got to use the phrase "sweet pukas dude." My day is made.
She's not allowed to do acid anymore... she started crying because she thought she was an eagle.
I guess we coulda said a little less mature audience and a little more e for everyone.
Randomize
