That's the secret to virgins: blizzards.
I woke up with ten beers in my bag that hoarded at the party last night. Rally? Its five somewhere.
I can't ever handle being "that girl" again. At least not until next semester.
2 showers later and I'm still finding cum on random body parts of mine
Boys that pee in my bed don't get happy birthday wallposts on facebook
I whispered "you're doing a great Job" when he was fucking me. Then high fived him.
These fuzzy pants work great for sleeping, taking an exam, getting baked and watching the hobbit. I guess i'm not changing pants for 72 hours.
No gay bar. My eyemake up looks like sex and Im using these dick daggers of mine tonight.
For a pair of gay men you destroy a lot of vagina.
I just gave myself a sponge bath with your sock. I hope you don't mind.
I was basically just fingering myself and thinking about space.
I'm eating shredded cheese and chugging coke, until I can function again. I'm tingling everywhere
I will feed you tacos. I will touch your butt. Happy Valentine's Day ❤️
I cannot belive our party caught on fire
He’s definitely circumcised. There’s not enough room in those speedos for a foreskin with that fire hose he’s packing.
Randomize
