I feel kinda awkward using the Sesame Street themed Google to search for hot young pussy...
The way I see it, if i don't fail the midterm and blow off some of the projects, how else am I going to get motivated to study for the final ?
You think they'd ask my permission before turning Pajamarama into an orgy. I saw too many of my friends dicks at once the door got kicked down.
Just took 11th shot of tequila. I may puke in my bear head.
We are not turning the camelbak into a beer bong
Oh my god, I am the best RA ever. I'm teaching my freshman girls how to deep throat on bananas as a group bonding activity. I'm making the religious ones eat them for potassium.
Apparently I took one a huge picture off the wall at the bar and was walking around dancing with it..
I am 100% planning on being drunk on Wednesday. This is America. Work or no work.
My dad just accidentally taught me how to make fake IDs. I love my life.
Sex and sushi don't even sound good right now... I might be on my death bed. To my Liz, I leave my extensive movie collection and my drinking supplies. To Olive I leave my car. Cause every Scottish terrier needs a 2010 Camaro.
I think we need to dedicate ourselves to building your stamina back to uterus breaking level
I have never appreciated strippers so much. Ma'am, you are an artist
Yo I get this girl alone in my room last night but she bounces cus she thought the full house poster was "weird"
there's crying, and people are upset, and there's a love triangle, and a broken heart, and so much estrogen
He had a small dick and screamed "I will kill you if you don't get hard" to it in German...awkward time to have to explain I speak German too...
This is why you need to stop sleeping with freshmen.
Randomize
