I stuck it in and pulled it out
Did she like it?
She giggled?
She liked it
You should have seen k-money last night. She was just hanging on to the toilet for half the night. By her fourth trip to puke, she started talking to it and was doing the voices for her and it. She kept saying "...we thank you for your continued business..." haha
did i get hit in the head with a hammer? someone just asked me...
Do you know who the random guy who just walked in to kiss me goodnight is?
say 'i' if you broke up a fight involving your father at TD bank today....
MASS TEXT! MASS TEXT! Your sad horny friend has finally gotten it in and can go back to being normal once again. You're welcome.
No dude I got way too drunk to function. 90% sure I tried to FaceTime 911.
There should be an open time period where you show each other your goods and it's totally socially acceptable to bail.
I wholeheartedly concur
I didnt finish. My brain kept playing the duck tales theme thru the entire blow job
Seriously, fuck work.
uh yea I'm curled up in the trunk of my car
What's dad's email?
askmom@cause.idk
I just had sex on my divorce papers. I've never felt so poetic.
I'm not winning any crowns in the Miss Emotionally Stable pageant either...
It wasn't until I lost my earring that I realized "I've been here before". Turns out we fucked a year ago. We've decided to make it a tradition.
She shouldn’t care what consenting adults do behind closed doors
You do realize it was her husband you were hooking up with behind that door, right?
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