id be glad to
That's kind of creepy but I guess since I'm wearing your dad's pants nothing is off limits anymore
we were making out and he got up to change his pants. I wonder what would happen if i took my shirt off.
Just turned elections for the sorority into a drinking game. Right on.
they're mlb prospects.. of course i'm gonna bang one of them.
Don't get the hula weed. It makes you sleep walk in destructive and confusing ways. I'll explain on Saturday.
I think it's safe to say me, swords and vodka can never be aloud in the same room again.
I'm having Vietnam flashbacks. This Kid I hooked up with is speaking in class and I keep experiencing the terror.
I just looked into the eyes of the man whose car I peed on last night
You know, part of me wants to die and the other part of me doesn't want to live
He just compared our sex to a grand slam on Wii fitness
You're doing it right
There's a fine line between kinky and serial killer
i got kicked out of the casino for drunken disorderly conduct because i kept stumbling into old people and one of them told on me. as the boucer was taking down my information so i could no re-enter i ripped my id out of his hands while yelling fuck you.
There are leaves in my underwear?
I just put together something from IKEA so that’s mandatory oral for a week.
Randomize
