Do you think you have hit the lowest point in your life when you find yourself actually condisering watching the movie "Gigli"?
a/c is broke at work...just took my panties off at my desk and the janitor saw it...might have a date for later. let you know
His hands were made for my vagina.
You were shirtless with a cowboy hat in 15 degree weather then u shotgunned a can of mixed vegetable Progresso soup
You don't take my phone while I'm passed out, have a three hour conversation on it with Dealer Dave, set up a date with him and NOT TELL HIM THAT HE'S NOT TALKING TO ME.
When you guys came back from the bar, I thought everyone was a T-Rex - Thats why i was hiding under the table. Never doing shrooms with Drunk people again
It's ok, I may have just peed outside your car and used your whataburger napkins. Hope you weren't saving them for a special occasion.
If drawing me a picture of his dick in draw something is flirting then he is doing it wrong.
We will. we just need a little inspiration.... in smoke form.
I told him I wanted to "ride him like a show pony" I think he gets the picture
of course we have a beer bong
how else would we feed our christmas tree
She told me a motorboat isn't successful unless they come out gasping for air. MISSION ACCOMPLISHED!!!
Happy cinco de mayo!! Puke filled sombrero in the lawn needs to be picked up and whos never punched my fence boards in half needs to replace those by the way the owner of those panties (see attached photo) anytime you wanna cum over;-) hiii!
My purse is full of condoms and money.
I like where this is going...
I have a lot of money, and no morals. shots on you when you get here.
Randomize
