Hey, what are you up to?
Drinking wine with the guys and watching 7 Pounds.
Looking back I guess I could have changed that to beer and Die Hard.
great sex! but now the fight over who sleeps on the wet spot starts.
She's helping me study for the final by writing the vocab words all over her body.
It's really too bad Cosmo doesn't have "What To Do When You've Drunkenly Sucked His Dick and He Doesn't Text You Back" article.
So this snow storm is NOT helpin my masturbation problem
no jill really. Evrything around me is talking to me. The plant, my dog, the tv,the lamp. Its amazing.
He said he got a lot of action last night. I asked how much? And he said he got to see down her shirt. Freshmen never cease to amaze me.
Its your turn to fuck our RA next time she threatens us with an underage.
Just tapped my penis on the head and said "this will be your year buddy."
don't care how drunk i am. my dick was like "nope, not doing it, you can't make me and i was like oh yes i can"
Have you ever felt like autocorrect is judging you with its suggested words? Like how it won't suggest certain words until you type in pretty much the entire word, is it just thinking 'No way did this dude use "consent laws" in the same sentence as "17th?" Or is that just me.
So I can officially say that someone has licked whipped cream off my nipples. Go senior year
Some guy walking down the sidewalk just looked at me and said "hey it's the world champ". How drunk was I on Friday...?
She wanted to get out of there before you guys woke up so she wouldn't let me find my underwear. Lol So I apologize to whoever finds that in your room.
I was very impressed with his ability to carry on a conversation with his friends sitting in the front seat with his hand in my pants, getting a hand job, stoned, with a cigarette in his mouth. I think he's a keeper.
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