Come back if u want to. I'll do some dirty shit to u mamacita.
Ha. No worries! So loud here &god I love drag queens! How does it happen, the congealing?
the girl next to me in class is drinking a margarita out of a slurpee cup. i know your going to ask how i know its a margarita and the answer is i can smell the tequila. i never want to leave this place
On the plus side this hangover is the tipping point that finally convinced my lazy ass to get some sunglasses.
No sexy Asian girl. No comfy bed. I'm just gonna lie here in the hall next to the garbage can until someone comes home.
She's the second Ashley to meet and blow me in the same night. Sensing a trend.
Well the streets were closed, so it was okay for me to just lay down for a little bit.
Lesson learned the hard way. If it's a "no" on a dating site, it's also a no if you ever run into the person anyplace in public. It's a slap if you mention wanting to poke.
I have alcoholic tendencies but you know what? College
Because making bad decisions is what makes our house great and I don't plan on changing that anytime soon.
You know you were way drunk when you wake up at 7 AM halfway on a couch, tangled in a sheet with your shoes still on.
Is it against health code to come into work half drunk and commando?
The good news is I woke up fully clothed, on top of my covers, with a half eaten granola bar. So, breakfast was waiting for me and I’m already dressed and ready to go today.
you fell asleep with her panties on your face. how are you surprised??
just realized I'll be in a check out line with just Hershey syrup and condoms. I don't know if I am setting a good image for our generation
Randomize
