Laying in bed naked with the guy I just fucked, talking to his WIFE who's sitting across from us like we're having a fucking tea party. This is interesting.
Why are you at a bar in Connecticut?
Long story. One that now involves lots of delicious chicken wings om nom nom
took him home. told him i would rock his world. passed out. a for effort f for follow thru
Using Dr. Seuss quotes to ask me how badly I want your penis is not appropriate.
letting you know, as a good neighbor, that when your windows open and your shade is up we can hear and see you dancing naked to money maker... nice boobs
How can it be called memorial day weekend....I don't even remember this weekend
I can't wait till you move in so I can stop drinking alone.
it's a Wednesday?
:)
well what is some mechanical horse racing with out blow involved
They don't allow McDonald's in the ER. Go figure
Well I sent him a pic of my vagina and sent back a pic of his puppy....so there's that
Right now he's sitting in the chair pointing to me to go away. He's trying to have quiet time with his penis.
he shit on the floor last night i'm not venturing down there
For an hr, you were convinced you no longer had a right arm so you played Super Mario Bros with just your left hand vs Beth. You won btw, mite b why she refused to wear the unicorn head
we're like the harlem globetrotters of underage drinking
This chick just walked out of the men's room with molly all over her nose and her shirt half unbuttoned. She nodded to all of us and said "gentlemen" as she exited
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