i'm three days dirty after drinking 14 hours last night and some other questionable behavior (hula hooping at a large concert, for example) i will just always bring the class. and the sluttiness.
Hey kate, how is it?
sloppy...it's emily. kate just tried to do a keg stand. they dropped her. we're leaving.
I put my bosses number in my phone as "Do not call," I shouldve known my drunk curiosity would overcome any desire I had to keep my job.
again?
I thought I walked in on an orgy of smurfs. Man I love shrooms
I think I love you, but I may be biased because we had pirate sex.
i wish i had a super power and that that super power was shooting out mdma from my fingertips or something
Although I commend your efforts to keep my penis away from her, your sister is now booty walking up my stairs. Good game though, good game.
Also when i was high i would close my eyes and see a puppy on a grill having pancake batter poured on it.... And for whatever reason it was fucking hilarious.
We designated a driver... But it was me..... So we designated another driver
I just blew my weed a kiss
Someone drunkenly cleaned and organized my car last night... Nothing's missing, so that's a plus.
I refuse to plan drunken casual sex. Just think of the monster I'd create.
Only in the emergency room do they shut the door when youre laughing too hard
Was that before, or after strip tac toe.....
Woke up with a girls naked next to me I had her thong on somehow.
Randomize
