I was staring at you from my window across the quad. I wanted to let you know so it's not creepy
Exactly. I don't do penetration on the first date. Blowjobs however are perfectly acceptable.
I encourage the greeting beej. It determines if the dick is worth keeping around.
So then I sent a pic msg of the Magnum XL box to her friend
had a convo with my professor before class while peeing... new level of awkward or a breakthrough in our relationship? i feel like there is no longer a professional boundary.
He called me a "functional alcoholic" like its a bad thing.
We can't bring brittanys dog so we are getting high and getting in my bathtub I think it's pretty safe
how many past hook-ups can i invite to go bar hopping with me for my b-day before it becomes a bad idea?
Aj and I already plan to tape our thumbs to our palms so we know how it feels to be a t-rex.
I wish I could walk around this campus with a big stamp that says "Approved" and just stamp girls asses as they pass.
You put Smirnoff in your grape juice and called it communion...
I was just sitting on the ground alone in fetal position shivering and chewing on my hand when she found me. ecstasy was not my best idea.
Sorry I invoked the "everyones getting smacked including myself policy last night"
My penis has like 3 people bidding on it
yknow last night was like... the third night in a row alex woke me up to make sure i wasn't dead and tbh it's sorta sweet.
I just found an old slice of LIME in my wallet?????????
Randomize
