she is the female version of PC from the mac and pc commercials..i'll still hit tho
So then I told him that only a restaurant managed by a florida fan could run out of ketchup
he was wearing 3D glasses the whole time.
is asking a girl out on a date while in another girls bed in poor taste?
can your parents tell?
i just had a cookie in one hand and a phone in the other and tried to eat my phone...they know
Ps I don't think it counts as being open minded if you didn't know he was missing a leg until you had already started making out.
I feel the need to send all my exes pictures of penises larger than theirs. Because they all must suffer.
Today is going to be the longest game of "was that a fart, or do I need to go wipe?" I have ever played. Maybe the most challenging too.
Nothing like being buzzed at 10:20am off wine shots in Amish country
I didnt finish. My brain kept playing the duck tales theme thru the entire blow job
Dude did I even see you at the bar. Cause I was for sure there then the next second apparently I was crying next to my Christmas tree because nobody believed in me.
Your cock has been in the back of my throat. Co-worker is no longer a sufficient title. Fix that shit ASAP
If me saying "come f***k me now" is talking, then yes.
What, That's like a total 7 inches of cock and 6 are from Joe. Don't be mad at me because you had the lamest orgy ever.
I'm legitimately the first person in the United States to successfully shave their balls with a Razer Blade of a sword and fully admitt it. I'm honestly smoother then a 10 year old.
Randomize
