her voice honestly makes me want to vomit. i have springsteen cranked up all the way.
I am so fucking pissed, there are no Shamwows in the As Seen on TV Store.
Looks like you'll have to stick to jizzing in socks.
My T9 Word has dryhumped saved but I can't even get it to figure out bbq.
Having sex with the stobe light on was the best bad idea I've ever had.
i called him pencil dick in front of over half of his fraternity brothers...
...never gotten so many high fives in my life! fuck ya i win!
He just kept muttering to himself "stabby stabby stabby stabby" while we were boning. I will never be boning him again.
I am not sure which is more amazing; The fact that she offered me sex, beer AND nachos, or that she can properly use a semi-colon at her current blood alcohol level.
watched two friends get underages. one had a shirt on that said lets get wasted while the other said to the cop "i understand your just trying to do your job but that was dirty bro".
I think that was him coming out to me. I just brushed it off
Why did you make me get in the car with you and then not give me a ride? I woke up in a bar with a blanket on me.
I'm basically flying you out for a long weekend of sex and going to the zoo
I'm cool with that
If a cougar buys you pizza and wants to show you her newly-won house, you have sex with her. It's the law. Just being all the man I can be dude
I haven't even sucked a boob is 6 weeks I hate not college
There something liberating about walking through the dorm hallways without pants on.
This is why we can never be just regular friends. The shit we do is not regular
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