i was unsuccessful, further solidifying for me that girls should not masturbate.
If you want her to think you're a true humanitarian, you may want to stop referring to Hands Across America as "the Ghostbusters 2 of fund raisers."
I'm gonna play a drinking game called "Sarah takes the train"
Say it nicely.
Fine. I want to lovingly bend you over and lovingly fuck the shit out of you. Happy?
We've done the math and the dogs tails are wagging at a rate of 3000 wags per hour. Stoned.
Hes flirting with her via the sauce packets at taco bell....... I have no words
While I faked being asleep, he literally prayed to God out loud, asking for forgiveness for losing his virginity before marriage.
The cop actually kicked the bitches out of the cab so we could get ours. I flipped them all off as the door was shutting. That drunk.
I don't know if you've ever seen a group of 20 year olds reenact a rectal prolapse, but 'majestic' isn't really the word I'd use...
do you remember your solution to not spill your drinks last night? .. Shots, that way you wouldnt have time to spill them. i love your drunken logic haha
I don't care. She's the only girl to make me feel like my face is melting when she blows me.
So the bar crawl I'm on is a "90s bar crawl" and I made the joke about a few overweight girls that "lack of concern for your weight is so 90s" it did not end well
dude you know how i got totally hammered and lost my phone at some frat when i came to visit you two months ago? yeah well someone mailed it back to me in minnesota.. with a picture of a cock as the screen savor
Come get your boyfriend. He is hammered talking to me about hot dogs and casinos.
Next time you decide to post pictures of yourself in your underwear on facebook, please don't tag me as your bulge.. My mom spent 10 minutes looking for me in that picture. I had to tell her I was hiding.
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