Would it be weird if I brought slabs of bacon with me to the beach?
It's American, baby! There ain't nothin gross about America.
so whats your words to drink to for the state of the union? mine are 'change' 'fight' and 'you know'.
mine is 'the'.
he had a TATTOO on his FACE. a tattoo on your face basically says "i've gone as far in society as i'd like to."
they said he just opened the front of his shirt and threw up alll over himself
His penis will pick the quickest route to vagina. it's like an biological onstar.
Going to the market. I need some nachos and a serious re-evalution of my life.
They left me passes out in the food donation bin with an empty handle and a half eaten box of nutter butters
Also, what is a socially acceptable way to introduce a crossbow in public?
I just got carded by a ten year old.
Your text makes more sense read in reverse.
I saw a spider on my bed and my first reaction was to throw my weed bag to safety
I hope a pyrotechnic goes off in your asshole and seals it shut for life.
Me too.
I'm not in it for just the sex. If I wanted mediocre dick once a week I would have stayed with one of my exes.
Dashing through the vodka, in a tinder swiping rage, all the fuck boys get a no, laughing all the way.
Randomize
