have u ever looked at the reflection of the water n watched the poop come out of u?
why can't you just be normal
I mean we're not committed. He's my first choice, sort of like miller lite. When I'm at the bar I'm going to order one, but if they don't maybe I'll go for a bud or blue moon. I'm certainly not going to stop drinking
we seriously had to hang a plastic bag on his ears so he could throw up right into it.
watching my parents drink 4 loko out of usf cups playing pool and rocking out to ACDC...
Can I come live with you?
It must be illegal for me to be this drunk in front of this many children
French fry pizza
Are you brilliant or just really high?
Can't it be both?
truck drivers should not leave their trucks unlocked with cigarettes inside when we're drunk and walking around.
True. I'd rather snort cocaine off a homeless guy then work on the weekend...Actually that may not be that bad.
We sang "Whole New World" in harmony and he spun me around. You may now barf from the cuteness.
Our 450 pound cab driver smells like McDonalds and sunblock with a touch of vodka. Correction I smell like vodka.
She was wearing my robin hood hat from Halloween shouting "steal from the rich and give to the poor, mothafuckaaaaas." We are taking her everywhere.
He put his hand in my cleavage. NOT ON. IN. BETWEEN. NO more gingers
If I show up to the mall alone looking like I do to purchase a vibrator and some Japanese food, I would judge me too.
But I don't wanna live with them bc I need to be able to walk around naked and sex on any surface guilt free.
I had to remind him last night as he had his arm around me, "We hook up, we don't cuddle!"
Randomize
