Yeah....I really appreciate it....I didn't even get it from hooking up....lame, atleast if a girl gets u sick when u r hooking up it was fun in its inception...
Do you need to be saved?
No I think I'm God
its good she wears the same dress to all the weddings so we can track how fat she's really gotten
so glad i banged her when she was skinny
I showered today. Officially upgrading myself to useless.
Wednesday. Otherwise known, to you at least, as "there are two gay men in my bed" day.
he told her to call him "Frog Legs" and she still fucked him and not you.
The bouncer yelled at him for poking at the guy selling roses, I think it's time to leave.
can you blow me for old times sake
only for old times sake
remember that guy i blew in a bathroom in barcelona, i just blew him again in rome. lightning does strike twice.
I just saw two homeless guys bond over the fact that they both use Crown Royal bags as wallets in Burger King.
My life is a video game called get the drunk princess back to her castle, thank you to all that participated
You guys go ahead and have your romantic night. I'm gonna keep my vday tradition alive of angry banging a stranger.
Tonight I'm getting fucked up for America because Lord knows we need it.
I now know he's been cheating for a while. I also know HER name, address, phone number, Facebook account, religion and zodiac sign. I feel like I'm earning my restraining order. Point is, never fuck over a librarian.
Why don’t they have healthy alcohol yet?
Randomize
