I'm not unpopping my collar. This shirt is too expensive to crease.
I totally got off with my controler for my ps3. Soooo glad I ended up with that racing game for Christmas.
Maybe you should have studied instead of worrying about who is going to have sex with you
This is getting ridiculous. See/touch her boobs=good day. Not see/not touch her boobs=bad day. I am legitimately depressed over the lack of tits in my hands right now.
Like if Robert Downey Jr. and Kiefer Sutherland got together for a bender, that's how drunk I want us to be.
OMG A WOMANS PROSTETIC ARM JUST FELL OFF AT BAGGAGE CLAIM
I'll be there in 5 min. If not, read this again.
Second day of summer classes and i already got this girl to send me nudes during class
that is WHY your in summer classes
worth it
it was really awkward meeting your mom for the first time while i was still wearing the condom we were using.
Well I knew we were drunk when I told you it was a good idea to shit in the ocean
I don't even know man. I was to busy having beer showered on me and grabbing some balls
The worst thing about him living around the corner is that who ever suggests the booty call is the one that walks over.
Let me be the vehicle for you to live out your slutty half-gay dreams.
sometimes a perk of being a drug dealer is amazon gift cards. who knew?
idk i usually just blame everything on steve
Steve quit two months ago
Randomize
