ur plase or mine? lol
well if you don't learn how to spell, you may be at your place and I'll be at mine.
If someone cant be won over with guacomole and tequila they are not worth your time.
Just facebooked the guy whose name you're yelling in there. So you're aware, his interests include "swearing at babies" and "Ice luge"
Apparently the last thing they remember of me was me stumbing into a bathroom, then falling out 5 minutes later clutching a butter knife repeating "ketamine goes in my face hole"
We need to go to the store an get depends. I really don't want to be bothered with the bathroom this weekend.
Shes sitting on the front porch puking in to the pumpkin she just carved...in the rain. I guess pumpkin spice tequila shots wasnt our best idea.
It mathmatically balances. Less pants + more shirt = fully clothed. see? Not a whore!
The only thing keeping me calm right now is pretending to chop off everyone's heads when using the paper cutter
She had a tattoo on her pelvis that said "it's cock-o-clock" an had clocks and hot dogs exploding away from it. I'd like to tell you it was deal breaker buuuuuuut.......
You were naked with a chalice of Skittles vodka, singing along to Les Miserables.
I probably should have eaten more before I started shotgunning beers at 9am, but it was so much damn fun.
I've been here 11 months and i just realized i have literally never looked at my apartment/roomates sober
Would it be sad if I made a blanket fort to get drunk in till the power came back?
Accidentally typed message to mom that included word "kink." FML. Played it off as autocorrect from "drink" which was somehow more acceptable
Eat, nap, & pace yourself. Words to live by.
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