i just won a 100 dollar gift card to walmart in a karaoke contest...i love kentucky
I hate babysitting girls whose boobs are bigger than mine.
Our phone convo was getting intense. Then I heard her say "quiet mommy is trying to have phone sex"
Yah, I definitely wouldn't wanna be fingered with a fake arm...
Well he told me I'd never be a wizard, and so I responded with you'll never have a big penis. After that we both just sat there and cried.
Can an epipen be used as a tranquilizer ?
I have a test in the morning in sign language about signs for drugs and alcohol use. Im drunk and rolling a blunt. I've never felt so confident about a grade in my life.
The dorm having an ice machine is their way of inviting us to make mixed drinks.
Just came to the realization that what I thought were orgasms were just lightheadedness from hyperventilation. My entire sex life is a lie.
Netflix, eggnog, and bed? Maybe some hand stuff?
Dude I used amphetamines responsibly today though. I snorted one in the am for work and then chewed one in the pm for other work. I'm an adult.
U sent me lyrics to wind beneath my wings
My liver misses your liver
I blacked out and when I woke up and looked at the counter.. there was a full cake upside down. I dont even understand ...
would you eat cereal with weed in it
who is this???
I feel like you should store your weed in something that suits your personality. For example mines in a hollowed out disney princess book.
Randomize
