so on my way home this naked dude runs right in front me his weiner at half mast screaming i'm only doing this cause its a 50 dollar dare
I can see my step sister's thong. Don't know if I should let myself be turned on or not
I wish they had a smiley of two girls making out
we fucked the fort apart but we'll rebuild it after we get some drinks.
Now he's galloping around the bar. I don't know whether to laugh or cry.
That's okay, during storytime I would have to sit on my hands so I wouldn't touch everyone. Explains a lot...
There is a mirror in the headboard of the bed that I'm sleeping in so I can immediately question life choices when I wake up.
According to FB I fucked in a field 365 days ago.
My meds have diminished my sex drive, this must be what regular women feel like
Come over so we can hookup and eat tacos. Those are 2 things you can't possibly turn down.
god, I have more takeout restaurants in my contacts than friends
Guys, as my favorite vagina consultants I have to share something.
My professional advice is not to put lemons in your lady pocket.
You've changed since you got that strap on
Why are you barefoot at a strip club?
Hey do you remember me?
You were the giant banana I had sex with... how could i forget?
Randomize
