dude you just took shreks wife home. what the fuck is wrong with you
when a bears hungry he eats besides shes got her nipples pierced
pray for me tomorrow cause I have a midterm that I've mostly studied for by watching Bill Nye episodes on the subject...
Went to use to bathroom and walked in on karaoke. Two girls singing "a whole new world" to each other in the shower. I'm gonna miss this place in the summer
I saw your arrest video on youtube. you look so thin!
Well look at it this way, if he should happen to get into a terrible accident within the next 2 days, its okay.. i have his dental records on my ass cheek.
Judging by what she did last night, I would say at least 4 of them have mono now.
She is trying to turtle bite me and when I pull away she says just let it happen. Then she pulled a poptart out of nowhere
I looked up while we were having sex to see him covering my pillow pet's eyes with his free hand. I think I'm in love
Seeing the pictures of him and i, I'm giving whiskey the win on this one. Definitely had beer goggles.
I just ran into the woods like an idiot because ADVENTURE.
It wasn't even dirty talking, it was more like the soothing gentle nonsense noises you make when you've spooked a horse.
I can't hookup with a guy in my car because it smells like Taco Bell..
You have the perkiest tits in all of North America. You're fine.
Is someone on their way here yet? I'm way too tweaked to be here alone
When they said they were gonna tattoo each other's gamer tags on their asses, I knew I no longer had a boyfriend.
Randomize
