??? When I first met her at the bar, she told me she was 23. After I bought her 3 shots of tequila, she told me she was really only 21. When we went back to my house, she said she was really only 19. She's still sleeping next to me butt naked. I'm afraid if she opens her mouth again I could be looking at 10 years.
I wonder what it would be like to be a slice of cheese.
I sold my books for weed money!
Finals don't start for a week...
he had a sign stolen from the tennis court hanging above his bed that said, "please limit play to one hour while others are waiting"
I'm still seeing blue. who wrote on my bare nipple?
How would u feel about transportimg a penis shaped ice luge to nashville?
They just built a gym in the same parking lot as my favorite bar. Drunk me is gonna be so excited.
dude, I convinced you I was your conscience for like 15 minutes last night. you weren't just "a little high"
Finally smoked with my brothers, I feel like I just won gold at the Best Older Brother Ever Olympics
he stopped talking to me, quit his job, moved out of the province and then told me it was "no big" when I called him apologizing...
I haven't had to masterbate since I started dating him over a year ago. I don't even know if I remember how and my vagina is calling.
I've officially slept through a hurricane, a tornado and had sex during an earthquake. I'm surviving.
Is it bad that we left the kid passed out on the bus? I think his name was texas. I was too drunk to be questioning this.
And then I was like pick your blow job song and he choose the sonic the hedgehog theme song. If he's not the one no one is.
I'm tired of you and your emotional constipation. WHY DO YOU CLOSE YOUR EYES WHEN WE MAKE LOVE!?
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