Wow, this guy is harder to get rid of than gum in pubic hair
so... thinking about masturbating finally
taking the losers way out I see
I cannot convey how much I really do love Chris Hansen. FYI: he is the JC Chasez of my adult years.
Legitimately semi-blackout across the table from the governor off a chardonnay i can't even pronounce.
Beware of calls from Dad. I just had a longer than I would care to admit convo about the ididarod. Apparently it starts tomorrow.
I'm having a flashback of telling a guy that he was beautiful and graceful like a unicorn while playing shuffleboard.
We were in the shower and he sat down an wouldn't do anything. I'm so glad he manscapes. It made washing his balls less awkward.
I told her she can't come to our bonfire because she throws up on herself & she has a mustache. And now apparently I'm a bitch or something.
i havent blinked in 235 seconds. now 247. now 258. 263. 267. 271. i also have been gifted with theability to both type and count and not blink. 293 so magical
i want us to warm up up with us making out while i lay you down touching and feeling all the spots you know are going to get you warmed up. im gonna move down your body kissing every inch as i move down past your panty line ;)
Did you watch the carolina game tonight?
And I told him that even though were not together, if he has sex with anyone I would have sex with someone else, video tape it and send it to him.
it'll be like a game of Russian Roulette, but with my vagina.
Today will be the day I throw up in my backpack in the middle of class
I climbed to the top of a stripper pole and touched the ceiling. Accomplishment?
everything I love is going to destroy me, so if coconuts are the answer, so be it.
Randomize
