The way you explained my vagina was exactly the way I would of described my breakfast burrito.
Is it a problem that I find my wife's 16 year old niece sexy?
so whats your words to drink to for the state of the union? mine are 'change' 'fight' and 'you know'.
mine is 'the'.
and then you went into taco bell without pants...and surprisingly you weren't the only one there without pants
it's like her boobs came off with her bra
So I put about 15 worms in the cuervo bottle. I don't think that's how it works but I feel like hallucinating by 11am
It was only 12:11 and I needed to make a Pepto Latte and call it a night, I don't remember that being part of my new years resolution.
But he's not just anonymous male genitalia anymore. I've met him, I've seen his face.
I told my boyfriend that the thing I missed most about him was scratching his balls for him.
That tampon felt like a stick in my vagina, I am never making a drunken tampon choice again. Friends don't let friends choose tampons drunk.
On a scale of 1 to 10 how concerned should I be
It's like jay gatsby himself preordained that our genitals meet again.
So I just watched a seagul attack my boss and steal his food in the parking lot. Today might not be a bad day lmfao.
Just fell down the stairs..might wanna call the ambulance jus take the weed out of my pocket be4 they come..
I’ve got a sex swing and lube, he’s not going anywhere soon
Randomize
