plz talk dirty to me
her vagina looked like a handful of raisins.
TAKE DOWN THAT PHOTO OF ME IN THE NURSES COSTUME NOW.
When i woke up this morning she asked me 'when did you first find out that you could see the future.' I gotta stop drinking.
Having sex with her is like doing taxes, Happens once a year and I usually end up paying.
My girlfriend and my fuck buddy both started their periods this weekend. The good news is, neither of them are pregnant. The bad news is, I'll have to find someone else to fuck til next weekend. No wait.....that's good news too.
It's almost like sex with her has gotten boring... like it's still good, but the creativity is lacking... it's times like these that i wish she still wanted me to gag her
does it still count as break up sex if it's 4 months later? sorry i'm just looking for an excuse to fuck him.
It's because you were crossfaded. And because drinks were 3 dollars. And because they accepted credit cards.
He came in 20 minutes late for his final wearing plastic bags on his feet, and a tablecloth cape. Explain.
I needed to do something spontaneous, and since no one had coke this was the next best thing.
She is sending me pics of her sex faces...which totally counts as sexting in my book
that was THE gayest party i've ever been to
To be fair, the theme was Cabaret. I don't know what you were expecting.
I have no idea what that means but I'm googling things just so I can watch my thumbs move
Next year for Halloween you can be the sword swallower, with a penis shaped sword.
Randomize
