Pretty sure my dad just walked in on me jerking off watching guys on webcam. Remember how I used to say "most awkward day of my life?" I'm retiring that phrase.
our health teacher's ringtone is Bad Romance and she has a tramp stamp. i will not skip this class, ever.
she refuses to pay for the plan b and so do i. it's the most dangerous game of chicken i've ever been involved in. but i have my pride.
He just slept in my bed for a couple hours and asked lots of questions about gay sex. No, I do not have his number.
I would have to gauge my vagina to make it fit.
Don't talk about his dick. That's mine. There's a copyright on it. Use with permission
Goodbye spring break, hello depressing video on AIDS.
Why is there a cash register on top of my car?
Def over. He sent me a nude selfie but cropped it right above his junk. Total Silence of the Fucking lambs looking.
I have bite marks all over my ass. Is that an acceptable excuse for missing class?
well I've taken an Uber to my weed dealers twice in the past 2 weeks so it's going well since I sold my car
Oh my god if I have to go on fetlife to find a guy who will fuck me right around here, I'm going to scream.
Once again I let my vagina make the decisions...that and vodka :(
You think my vibrator will be okay in the dishwasher?
He’s disease free and drives a Porsche. What else does a girl need?
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