Remember when I use to call my dick 'the pendulum'
wtf?
It is now the artist formerly known as 'insideyourgirlfriend'
Hey babe, chan wants you to stop texting her about the size of TJ's dick. please.
How much time is enough between masturbating and watching little bear?
I had to close one eye to read the questions on my final this morning. That hungover.
I don't remember much but I remember it was a unanimous decision that Santa was indeed real and Cait's stripping somehow proved this.
He just kept yelling "body massage machine go" at random intervals throughout the night
he confused my yawn for an orgasm
I may or may not go. send a pic of a nipple so I know how much fun you're having
After a little too much, I decided public urination was a constitutional right.. Nearly got deported for that one
dude, I convinced you I was your conscience for like 15 minutes last night. you weren't just "a little high"
Tell me how you feel about belly buttons
I was really proud of me too last night! Found a discarded hamburger that I have no memory of at the foot of the bed. Instead of a Dude. I'm really growing as a person
He asked me what I wanted for Christmas. I told him an orgasm would be nice.
I need a pedicure
You need to go to planned parenthood
I woke up to the sound of her peeing at the end of the bed at 4am.
Randomize
