Okay, I have a threesome with foreigners and suddenly I'm a man-whore
Idk if this white stuff in my shower is conditioner or... something else?
you just love her because she lets you bang her with fruits and veggies!
where'd the toddler underneathe the beer pong table come from?
I'm blazed about to take my 8am final. Another girl is too. We just looked each other in the eyes. She's my soul sister.
i swear, as soon as they invent a cure for herpes, he's mine.
You're married and I'm going to make out with a stranger tonight. Isn't that weird? It's like a gap in the time space continium.
I have fuck me eyes 4/5 people agree. It's like doctors or dentists but with ppl who have lots of sex and know these things.
I don't care how great the sex was, I cannot unsee what has been seen. I regret ever stalking his Facebook.
His flight is delayed. Mother Nature is delaying me from sex.
There's a man with a stuffed dog and a can of dog food on the L. Should I break it to him?
Best not to. Some people need their delusions.
He just unloaded a dump truck full of red flags on my head.
It's like fucking tetris in this bed
This girl was in the river screaming that someone didn't love her anymore...that's when the guy in a kilt claimed her...
Mom just walked in on a bj. IT'S WHATEVER.
Randomize
