Who is this?
Who do you want it to be?
Sarah Palin
I've got the updo, bangs, and glasses, but I'm blonde
Something clean will definitely be barfed on tomorrow.
she's got a whisker from her dead cat taped to the wall. I'm pretty sure that about sums it up...
My gym is having a pizza and beer party. God im starting to love this place.
I just won 10 dollars from out chugging the bar tender and I found out that the baby aint mine in the last hour. I don't even care if l get laid tonight any more.
I wish i could 80s montage me losing weight
I opened up my wallet and it was filled with puke.
playing nyquil roulette. it entails taking shots of nyquil and hoping it doesnt kick in during sex or in public. game on.
You asked me if you had to go downstairs to get upstairs. And then you forgot where you were.
It's disgusting. He breathes through his mouth and just sounds fat. Plus he chews all loud and shit.
Validation I posted a good pic? The lonely fuckboys send out the booty call signal. Of course I answered the call; Gotham needs its hero.
We walked around last night for hours saying nothing but nom nom nom and barking at each other.
got the runs at the club last night. wondering when it'll be safe to show my face again.
I’ll call you in a minute. Trying to book an AirBnB so I can finally bang the yummy guy from yoga
Your downward dog is going to rock his cock. I’m jealous
She's writing hockey erotica again.
Tell her to pick another team besides ours this time.
Randomize
